I've decided to take my blogging in two different directions, so this will be my last post on Blogue.
07 June 2009
The last post
19 April 2009
Reddit: yeah, I geddit
Reddit.com’s RSS feed (“what’s new online”) has been in my news reader for a while. As part of a cull of noisy, useless feeds, I’ve just deleted it. A more literate version of 4chan, with significantly less users, it produces the same results over and over. Here’s everything you need to know about Reddit users' worldview.
13 April 2009
OMG, Mr Darcy!
Excerpts from 1-star reviews of Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice on Amazon.com.
It just goes on and on and on, only to lead this sister ending up with that guy, this sister ending up with that guy, etc. — Adam Appleby
Personally I am disgusted. I think that they are all pompous and rather annoying. — A Customer
A terrible bore, really sort of a nightmare that never ends. — Laura “witchbaby”
I find this book repulsive. I am offended by every paragraph that I read. I have never felt such contemt for any work that I read. I pasionately despise this novel. The 17th century English aristocracy is offensive and without merit. — A Customer
Over two-hundred pages wasted on useless tasteless writing! It was a majority consensus in my senior English class that Pride and Prejudice was awful. — Elisabeth
Austen clearly never learned that readers do not like run-on sentences because the so called "novel" consists of run-on sentences that sometimes consist of more than one page. This novel is complete trash. — Mark Twain “Sam”
I hated this book. It was difficult to read, because Austen never seemed to get to the point, and everything seemed to happen so slowly. It was ridiculous. — cnyadan
this is possibly the boringest classice ever written, which is saying a lot considering the fact they're all quite boring. I mean look at the story, what a bunch of bull! What the hell...omg, Mr.Darcy! *rolls eyes* Could she not have thought of anything more exciting? — A Customer
This story was written in the early Victorian era, and hence it is quite old. I found it to be utterly boring. Maybe it was a big deal back in the time, but nobody cares nowadays. — krazykow@softhome.net
11 April 2009
Pile o' linx #1
toy
A simple audio interface with instant gratification.
[link]
bad
For Easter, a pair of horribly designed Christian sites.
[Exhibit A]
[Exhibit B]
useful
If you find something you want to read online but don’t have time to read it now, use Instapaper.
[link]
pointless
How fast can you click your spacebar?
[link]
video
Every straight man’s fantasy. A demo ad by Adam Green and Will Barratt.
[link]
odd
How to make a “thought screen” helmet to stop space aliens abducting you.
[link]
04 April 2009
Inconspicuous consumption
As the economy worsens, flashing the cash is seen as more and more inappropriate. Formerly logo-smothered fashion and accessories are out; discreet luxury is in.
Leading online luxury fashion retailer Net-a-porter is, not surprisingly, embracing the trend. Its standard delivery “signature” packaging is a fiesta of tissue paper, glossy branded boxes, boutique bags and ribbon. In these more “austere” times you can, instead, choose to have your £7,873 Oscar de la Renta beaded georgette gown delivered to you the way you once would have had your porn: in a discreet brown paper wrapper – recycled, of course.
Net-a-porter.com founder Natalie Massenet is also about to launch theOutnet, a discount offering that the UK Telegraph reported will sell clothes and shoes ordered by department stores but cancelled as the downturn kicked in. The site is currently collecting email addresses and carries the cheery slogan: “It’s chic-onomics!™”
02 April 2009
Making sense of the money mess
I suspect that most people outside the money industries don't really understand why the financial system collapsed and how pervasive it is. That's why all the various elements of it have just been put in one big conceptual box and called the "economic crisis".
This video, made by Los Angeles–based designer Jonathan Jarvis, is the best graphic visualisation of how this all came about I have seen, and I highly recommend it to you.
Jarvis is currently practicing in the Graduate Media Design Program at the Art Center College of Design in Pasadena. You can see some of his other projects – including a brilliant demonstration which makes all the mobile phones in a room ring simultaneously – at his website, here.
22 March 2009
Nice to meet you, too: some first impressions of Twitter
I’m aware that blogging about Twitter is like dancing about architecture, but I can’t write 140-characters-or-less forever. I also get that I'm late to the party but that's never stopped me before.
16 March 2009
Writing, writing, writing
I'm working on several writing projects at once at the moment, including contributing to a book, two other blogs (in another voice!) and my work.
I'm also trying out Twitter, so feel free to follow me there. I'm @kollektor.
28 February 2009
Why I love 30 Rock. Why I love Tina Fey. Why I love Alec Baldwin
24 February 2009
How'd I do? Hopeless!
My Oscar picks were terrible! Only one right: Sean Penn. It's a good thing I didn't have money on them!
23 February 2009
Yes, I know the way to San Jose
I don't know what Dionne Warwick's problem was. If your weeks in LA turn into years – how quick they pass – and it's time to head to San Jose, here's the way.
Los Angeles, CA
|
1. | Head southeast on E 1st St toward S Los Angeles St |
404 ft
| |
2. | Turn left at N Los Angeles St |
0.4 mi
| |
3. | Turn right to merge onto US-101 N towardPasadena/ |
10.6 mi
| |
4. | Continue on CA-170 N/ |
6.8 mi
| |
5. | Merge onto I-5 N |
249 mi
| |
6. | Take exit 403B for State Hwy 152 W towardSan Jose/ |
0.2 mi
| |
7. | Merge onto CA-152/
Continue to follow CA-152
|
33.8 mi
| |
8. | Continue on Pacheco Pass Hwy |
4.3 mi
| |
9. | Turn left at CA-152 |
2.5 mi
| |
10. | Take the US-101/ |
0.5 mi
| |
11. | Merge onto US-101 N |
28.2 mi
| |
12. | Take the W Story Rd exit |
0.5 mi
| |
13. | Merge onto Story Rd |
1.2 mi
| |
14. | Continue on Keyes St |
0.8 mi
|
San Jose, CA
|
19 February 2009
Just because you can type, it doesn't make you a writer. Or a mathematician
In a rare moment of restraint, TMZ marked the passing of Mickey Rourke's beloved chihuahua simply:
Loki Rourke
1991 - 2009
"Sometimes when a man's alone, that's all you got ... is your dog."
-- Mickey @ the Golden GlobesThe second and third reader comments on the story:
It's no wonder President Obama's Massive Stimulus Package includes $53 billion for education.
17 February 2009
Calls for lynching and torture on the evening news: Welcome to Australia 2009
On Thursday last week, a man was arrested and charged with starting a fire in Victoria, one that burned through the small town of Churchill, where he lived. That fire killed at least 21 people – the entire town has been declared a crime scene and the final number won’t be known until a forensic investigation is completed – and destroyed about 200 homes.
His name is Brendan Sokaluk and he’s 39. He was charged with arson causing death, intentionally lighting a bushfire and possessing images of child pornography. His legal aid defence lawyer told the court at his remand hearing that he was in “a fragile mental state” and “should be seen by a doctor”.
His chances of a fair trial are now almost nil thanks to some fervid vigilantism and its support in some sections of the media.
It’s not hard to understand that people want someone to blame. In some of these small communities, brought together in stressful circumstances, the whispers and rumours got so out of control that a high-level police officer had to appeal for people to stop reporting anything to the police unless they were actually material witnesses.
It’s not even hard to understand how all the shock and grief and anger could be channelled into hatred against a suspected arsonist. If you want evidence of it, just look at any of the dozens of Facebook groups people have been set up to vent it. (Here’s an example, although it might be already be gone as they are being shut down as they appear.) Of course, there’s a lot of posturing going on there, and the death threats – a serious legal issue – are endless, but there’s also an almost unbearable amount of pain.
The media coverage of the Sokaluk arrest has been remarkably restrained because, after its role in the Cronulla race riots in 2005, sections of the media have become a little more gun-shy about whipping up a mob mentality.
One notable exception was Channel Seven mic monkey Chris Reason who stood in Churchill on Saturday, reading out comments from Facebook:
“They've been posting comments like this. Quote: ‘Hope this bastard burns’ and this one: ‘Cut off his fingers and toes, re-stitch them, then cut them off again.’ Many residents in here in Churchill say they feel the same.”To prove that the residents of Churchill feel the same, he walked into the street and asked them, “What do you reckon the town would do if they got their hands on him?” One woman said, “I'd like to get him and pour petrol on him and burn him to death.” Another replied, “Oh, they'd tear him apart.”
If there’s a line between reporting and instigating lynching, Chris Reason crossed it. Sokaluk is still innocent until proven guilty (a concept that always flies out the window immediately in any emotionally charged case), and Reason irresponsibly jeopardised his chances of a fair trial in a very poor show of "journalism". No doubt Reason, and Seven, will be facing the legal consequences of their actions.
Brendan Sokaluk is due to appear again on 26 May, although there is a rising tide of legal opinion that says there is so little chance of a fair trial being possible that a permanent stay will be granted instead.
No deal
It's been a while but I have a couple of new writing projects on the go so, as always, the blog has to suffer.
26 January 2009
恭喜發財
Another new year party! Sydney is going all-out for its Chinese New Year celebrations this year. The festival, which started on Friday, goes for another three weeks, so it overlaps with the Sydney Festival, still in full swing, by a week. Much to be seen and eaten and explored, in that case.
Oh – it's Australia Day today, as well, so for me it means there are going to squadrons of warplanes roaring overhead all day and masses of fireworks in the evening. We're going to get among the mayhem in Chinatown tonight: lion dances, street food and strings of noisy red firecrackers. Yay!
Welcome, Year of the Ox. 恭喜發財 - kung hei faat coi! Good luck and good fortune!
24 January 2009
Too darn hot
23 January 2009
Picking on Oscar
My picks are, appropriately, in gold.
Best Picture: "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button," "Frost/Nixon," "Milk," "The Reader," "Slumdog Millionaire."
Actor: Richard Jenkins, "The Visitor"; Frank Langella, "Frost/Nixon"; Sean Penn, "Milk"; Brad Pitt, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"; Mickey Rourke, "The Wrestler."
Actress: Anne Hathaway, "Rachel Getting Married"; Angelina Jolie, "Changeling"; Melissa Leo, "Frozen River"; Meryl Streep, "Doubt"; Kate Winslet, "The Reader."
Supporting Actor: Josh Brolin, "Milk"; Robert Downey Jr., "Tropic Thunder"; Philip Seymour Hoffman, "Doubt"; Heath Ledger, "The Dark Knight"; Michael Shannon, "Revolutionary Road."
Supporting Actress: Amy Adams, "Doubt"; Penelope Cruz, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"; Viola Davis, "Doubt"; Taraji P. Henson, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"; Marisa Tomei, "The Wrestler."
Director: David Fincher, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"; Ron Howard, "Frost/Nixon"; Gus Van Sant, "Milk"; Stephen Daldry, "The Reader"; Danny Boyle, "Slumdog Millionaire."
Foreign Film: "The Baader Meinhof Complex," Germany; "The Class," France; "Departures," Japan; "Revanche," Austria; "Waltz With Bashir," Israel.
We'll see how I went on 22 February, I suppose.
A rather more short-term prediction: Heath Ledger will be on the cover of tomorrow's papers here, while they'll be some guff about the massively over-hyped Australia scoring only a costume nomination, and grumbles about Baz, Nicole, Hugh and Cate being "overlooked". (There's some merit to the Cate angle: she drove Ben Butt, even when working with a puppet. Australia, by contrast, was craptacular eye candy.) It makes a change from Cate, a cartoon and a cameraman being the "Aussie chances". That, at least, we can verify tomorrow. Zzzzzzz.
Update: Ledger, as The Joker, on the cover of all three newspapers. And this in the Telegraph:
Exactly a year after his death, Heath Ledger has earned a posthumous Oscar nomination early this morning.Ledger was nominated for best supporting actor for his diabolical turn as The Joker in The Dark Knight.Cate Blanchett missed out on a nomination for her role in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.Romantic epic Australia scored a single nomination - for costume design for Catherine Martin.The film's director Baz Luhrmann, stars Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman and cinematographer Mandy Walker were all overlooked.Ta da!
22 January 2009
21 January 2009
19 January 2009
Black in name only
It turns out that black box flight recorders aren't black.
This is the flight recorder from the US Airways plane that landed on the river in New York. While it's somewhat blackened around the edges, it's not black. Being bright orange makes it easier to find.
Aussie's miracle escape from Flight 1549The thoughts and feelings of the plane's 154 other passengers were unreported.
"There were no screams, tears, just a strange peace," the only Australian on board, 26-year-old Emma Cowan said.
The angry man
My local supermarket is open until midnight. At about 11, two guys start to close down the deli section. It’s obviously a big job: they have to put away all that neatly folded ham, coleslaw, fish fillets and mystery meat.
I like to shop late when the place is pretty much empty. I shop fast and don't need obstacles like people hunting though the 50 different mouthwashes to get in my way. It’s just around the corner and I enjoy a little late-night retail therapy.
Last night there was a man standing at the deli counter. He was 50-something, about five feet tall, wearing shorts, a singlet and thongs. He was the very image of a short, fat Aussie man. He was barking at the deli guy.
“The sign says midnight. If you’re going to close sections down, you need to say it on a sign out the front.”
The deli guy was barely following where he was going, but I could see it coming a mile away.
“You know, legally I could sue you for false advertising.”
He screwed up his face, turned to the short, fat woman he was with and barked, “Come on. We’re going.” He marched out, hamless and muttering, past the checkouts, while she trundled along behind him.
As if he hadn’t made his point at the deli, he stood at the door and shouted, “Bloody hell, woman. Hurry up. We’re never coming back here.” He took a few steps outside and, as the automatic doors were closing, managed to bark out his parting shot: “Ever!”
18 January 2009
13 January 2009
Goodbye to all that
07 January 2009
There's cutting edge and there's just getting it wrong
I'm not an apostrophe Nazi unless it's work-related. I recognise that English is complicated and that punctuation can be tricky, so I'm fairly forgiving – by which I mean I wince but I get over it – when I see things like "CD's" as the plural of "CD". However, this job ad caught my eye. They really need to fill this position.
06 January 2009
Barbie's resume
Barbie turns 50 years old this year and, like many mature-age workers, she has quite an impressive resume. Here's a random sampling of her work experience.
Air Force Fighter Pilot
United States Army officer
United States Navy officer
Art Teacher
Sign Language Teacher
Spanish Language Teacher
Student Teacher
American Idol contestant
Ballerina
Circus Star
Movie Producer
Movie Star
Radio City Music Hall Rockette
Rock Star
Health, Beauty & Fitness
Aerobics Instructor
Dentist
Doctor
Fashion Model
Nurse
Pediatrician
Surgeon
Veterinarian
Yoga Instructor
Politics
Ambassador for World Peace
Candidate for President
President
Service
Babysitter
Chef
Firefighter
Flight Attendant
McDonald's employee
Police Officer
Sports
Cheerleader
NASCAR Driver
Olympic Figure Skater
Olympic Gymnast
Professional Figure Skater
Tennis Star
WNBA Basketball Player
World Cup Soccer Competitor
Other
Astronaut
Cowgirl
Paleontologist
05 January 2009
Back to work: Ouch!
I went back to work today after two glorious weeks off, and it wasn't pretty.
03 January 2009
02 January 2009
A matter of inches: just how tall are our modern stars?
At 5’4” (162.5cm), here’s a group of statistically average height women: Drew Barrymore, Catherine Deneuve, Queen Elizabeth, Madonna, Britney Spears and Elizabeth Taylor.
At 5’9” (175cm), here’s a group of statistically average height men: Antonio Banderas, Albert Einstein, James Dean, Robert De Niro, Michael Douglas and Jack Nicholson.
Tom Cruise is regularly characterised as being “short”, although he is just two inches shorter than the average man at 5’7” (170cm). (His ex, Nicole Kidman, is a smidge over 5’10” [178cm] in flats, which kinda explains it.) Men the same height as Cruise include Robert Downey Jr., Al Pacino and David Spade. Although statuesque in her proportions, Angelina Jolie is also 5'7".
An inch shorter: Dustin Hoffman, Henry Winkler, and Joseph Stalin.
An inch shorter still (5’5”, 165cm): Woody Allen, Fred Durst, Lou Reed and Charles Manson. Women of the same height: Pamela Anderson, Jennifer Lopez, Renee Zellweger and Marilyn Monroe.
Bette Midler and Kylie Minogue are both 5’1” (155cm), while Dolly Parton is an even 5-footer. So, too, was Queen Victoria.
01 January 2009
A flying start
At 11pm last night, Mike and I were having a quiet-ish margarita at the Bayswater Brasserie. By 11.30, with Amy and Janie, we were in a little boat leaving Double Bay wharf. We boarded the MV Flying Fish, moored in the middle of the harbour, and 10 minutes later the New Year’s Eve fireworks started, and this was our view. Awesome!
31 December 2008
One last thing
I'm drowning in other people's "Best of 2008" lists, so I'm not going to add to the pile. Instead, just one lovely thing from 2008 that still makes me laugh every time I see it.